Tuesday, September 23, 2008

Failure with asterisks

I failed. I took on way too much and the hatchet of sacrifice has come down on HDFS 510, Theories of Human Development.

By that, I mean that I have discontinued taking a class through Iowa State University. I had eliminated the idea of a degree about two weeks ago when it became obvious that this degree wasn't really going to help me be a better priest/campus minister. But I thought I'd "gut out" the class I was in. However, it has become clearer that the class is not only not going to help me be a better campus minister, the amount of time it was taking just to do "adaquately" meant that I couldn't even be a decent campus minister. So, I dropped it. Or at least I will drop it. When I figure out exactly how Iowa State does that.

I feel kind of like a failure. I should have looked deeper into the content of the course to determine how useful it would be. I should have made sure I could dedicate the time to be able to be successful. I should have done a lot of stuff. But, I didn't.

But, failure is the other side of the "learning a lesson" coin. I learned that I'm too busy to take a class during the school year. I learned that this isn't the direction I want to take with my academic career at this point. I even learned that the social sciences make my head hurt because they are really intelligently done (for the most part). And, perhaps, most important of all, I learned that being a student really is a terrible life. I'm not called to be a life-long student. I am supposed to be a priest.

1 comment:

Joyce Babbitt said...

Depending on the situation, just as we can sometimes say more through our silence than by our words, sometimes we accomplish more by doing less...and you are a very, very good priest:)